Good food and beautiful sights aren’t enough—you need great photos too! A netizen girlfriend shows you how to have fun in Taichung

Text and photos byQing Shihuang

Hi everyone, I’m Qing Shihuang. Since my love history is so glorious, I can’t possibly have just one girlfriend. Today’s date is with a girl-next-door type who’s determined to learn how to become an internet beauty. Thinking of “girl-next-door,” I thought of Lin Jialong, so I decided to bring her to Lin Jialong’s Taichung City for an internet beauty trip.

“Hi~ Shihuang, do you think this outfit makes me look like an internet beauty?”

Uh… actually, I think she looks more like she’s saying,

“Mr. Qing~~, why did you take so long to get here~~”

“Honey, this high-speed rail station is so pretty, let’s take a selfie together!”

“No way!You take the picture for me first, I want to post it on IG.”

“Make my legs look longer, and get your angle lower!”

Am I not low enough already...

“Honey, do you think I’d make a good show girl?”

Show what girl? I think you’re more of a “shy” girl... The security guard nearby actually thought you were a car model.

Then, we transferred to a train and saw lots of train-themed artworks at the train station.

“Honey, this place is perfect for photos, come take one for me!”

“There are clearly other big artworks here, but you insist on picking this tiny train you could find on any street corner...”

“Don’t talk while taking the photo, it’ll shake the lens. But if you don’t shake, I might get knocked to the ground.”

I’m already on the ground...

After a long morning of traveling, I really needed a good meal, and to rhyme with that, I wanted Lipton tea.

We went to Tufang Breakfast & Brunch Café. Even our five internal organs needed recharging, but my girlfriend just wanted to dazzle the camera.

“Wow!You could totally be this shop’s poster girl!” I’m guessing she didn’t care at all whether she was blocking the sign.

“Are you done yet? The sun is really strong.” The honey struck a sweet pose while worrying I’d get heatstroke.

After about 500 shots, our overly flashy-looking meal finally arrived.

This dish made us eager to dig in, ravenous even—but we won’t say “ravenous” or “eager.”

“Shihuang, weren’t you going to teach me how to take internet beauty photos?”

“Alright, first imagine you have a toothache in your right molar.”

“Great, now imagine pain in both cheeks.”

“Very good, very good, one more—now pretend you’ve got a concussion in the back of your head.”

“Perfect expression and pose, one more… now pretend you’ve got knee pain.”

I don’t know why, but that sentence just slipped out of my mouth instinctively.

Turns out my knees really were hurting…

Trying to emulate those social media influencers, my girlfriend ordered so much food. After taking photos, she made me eat it all myself—I was so full I let out a huge "burp." Then we headed off to eat at "Bao Ge."

It’s an ice cream shop with an elegant decor, and somehow my girlfriend’s suitcase also ended up in the frame, blending right in.

Just looking at the decor told me it wasn’t going to be good—another restaurant where you just can’t stop taking photos.

Before I could even finish my sentence, my girlfriend dragged me off to take pictures. “We just ate, won’t I look fat in the photos?” she complained.

“Of course not, you’re always checking in at the gym!”

That’s what I said, but clearly, it’s only my calories that are going down.

We took another 700 shots before our ice cream finally arrived.

“Baby, these little compartments with all the different flavored sauces—it’s just like how I feel about being with you…”

“What ‘Return of the Condor Heroes’? What are you, Erkang? Hurry up and take a photo for me, I want to post a story.”

This woman is so practical—not…I mean, this ice cream has to be eaten within a certain time before it melts.

“Baby, you try it first and tell me if it’s tasty.” my girlfriend said.

“Oooooooooo!!!!”

“Well? Is it good?”

“Sensitive teeth.”

“..............”

Just then, my baby suddenly picked up the macaron from the ice cream.

“Shihuang, guess what connection this macaron has with me?”

“Oh oh, I know, you both look like Ma Rulong...”

“It’s Tiffany green, just like my suitcase!”

Thank goodness I hadn’t finished that sentence.

While we were taking photos, another set meal arrived.

My baby suddenly grabbed one of the bread rolls to take a photo.

“Come on, baby, imagine this is the sofa at home, strike a cozy pose.”

“Excuse me, no peeing or pooping in our store.” The staff suddenly came out to stop us.

And who poses like that on a sofa at home anyway…

And so we ended our Bao Ge ice cream experience in a rather awkward position.

On the way, we passed by the Civic Plaza.

Smart move, just take a photo with the landmark’s name—saves time tagging the location.

“Shihuang, get lower, I want my butt to look good in the shot.”

Suddenly, all the old uncles playing chess nearby turned to look and clapped in admiration. They must have been cheering for my courage in lying on the ground.

Later, we headed to the popular photo spot among influencers—Audit New Village.

“Honey, hurry up, someone else might take this spot!”

I don’t get it—this wall looks 87% identical to the fire escape alley behind my house. But every corner has people lining up to take photos.

“Honey, be careful not to flash your underwear while sitting on the stairs taking photos. Don’t let any perverts snap a picture of you!”

“Perfect, one more shot!”

While looking for the next photo spot, we spotted a shop with a rather unique name.

Miss Sen’s Tea Shop—in Taiwanese, it sounds like “Play Miss’s Tea Shop.” You can tell right away it’s all about pure, pitch-black tea.

“Honey, even with all these complicated English letters here, I still managed to find my LOVE for you.”

My stroke of romantic genius—she must have been moved to death.

“............”

“Brother, you know how it is—sometimes women can be just so hurtful. Solidarity, my man.” The dog’s expression seemed to understand the frustration in my heart.

As soon as we walked into the shop, a colorful cabinet caught our eye.

Each jar contained special teas and little cards perfect for confessions.

“Honey, this is for you—it’s filled with my feelings for you.”

“...................”

“Brother, you know how it is—sometimes women can be just so hurtful. Solidarity, my man.”

After complaining, I was dragged back to take more photos.

“This dried flower wreath is so beautiful, it’s almost prettier than me.” My honey was hinting that I should compliment her.

“Wow, honey, you’re as beautiful as Ru Hua.”

Suddenly, I felt an intense, almost menacing aura—it was the shop owner standing right beside me.

“Uh… ma’am, you’re blocking my shot.”

For some reason, the shop owner kicked us out.

After leaving Miss Sen’s Tea Shop, we came across an unbelievable sight.

There was a dog that seemed to be taking advantage of its long fringe covering its eyes to peek at something it shouldn’t be seeing.

After leaving Audit New Village, we arrived at Caotun Avenue.

“Shi Huang, there’s a racetrack here—I want to be a race queen!”

“Honey, watch out for the cars!”

“Slow down a bit, will you?” I muttered angrily at the racer who almost hit my girlfriend.

Then we heard a beautiful sound drifting over.

“It’s street performers, honey, go take a photo with them!”

“Wait, honey, they’re singing—you’re not supposed to just take photos of them like that.”

"Shut up and get down!"

"O...kay..."

All day long, my girlfriend had been wearing high heels and her feet were sore. I’d been the photographer all day and my knees were aching too. Since we happened to pass by the Shui Ge sale, maybe I should buy my girlfriend a pair of casual shoes.

"Excuse me, my girlfriend’s feet are sore. Do you have any recommended casual shoes for her?" I called out loudly in the store.

"Let me introduce something to you. Converse is on special offer right now, everything is 50% off and then another 50% off, lightly folding you in half too." The clerk spoke while singing.

This clerk is way too enthusiastic. Just one pair is enough—why are they pulling out red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet, white, gray, and black?

"Sir, I see your knees might be rubbing often. Let me give you two knee pads." The clerk is really observant and thoughtful.

"That’s not enough. Look, the soles of the shoes don’t look good in photos. It’ll be embarrassing to go out like this. I’ll get you a pair."

The clerk even cared about the soles of the shoes—but who notices whether the soles look good or not?

"Alright now. Look, this looks much better in the photo." That’s true—I’ve only been showing my back when taking pictures for the influencers, at least the soles need to be eye-catching.

"Shi Huang, which color sports bra do you think looks good? I’m going to wear it to the gym and post a photo."

Oh no, I saw so many types of sportswear at the sale. Given women’s personalities, I’m bound to have to take a picture of each one for her.

"You don’t actually need all these clothes—you’re already beautiful enough."

Even though I had knee pads, my elbows will probably fall apart soon too.

What to do........... Ah-ha, I’ve got an idea.

"Come on, bring it on." I said confidently. I’ve now upgraded to Gear Guy—covered in protective gear from head to toe. Taking thousands of photos won’t be a problem.

"Come on, give me an appendicitis pose first!"

"Great, now give me a herniated disc pose!"

u?hellip; sports bras aren’t supposed to be worn like that as outerwear—she must really go to the gym just to post photos.

We left the Shui Ge sale with the heart-patterned sneakers recommended by Manager Ah Hong.

The sky had darkened, and we arrived at Qimei Park.

"It’s the Four Heavenly Kings—Leon Lai’s concert!" my girlfriend said.

"Honey, that’s the May 7th 'Rescue Leon' event, aimed at protecting the next generation and defending the Leon Kindergarten." I said seriously, lying on the ground.

"Okay~~~ I understand~~~ Take another one for me~~~"

From her tone, did she think it was a grassland concert?

After the photos, I was starving—I’d done more than ten times my usual amount of physical activity. Walking around near Qimei, I spotted a restaurant with a strong pumpkin vibe.

The interior decor was perfect for influencers, but I was hungry and didn’t want to take any more photos. If she asked me to take another photo, I’d really lose my temper.

The portions were huge too. Wait—she’ll only take one bite and I’ll have to finish the rest.

"Honey, take a photo for me…"

I think I just heard the magic word.

"No." I was really tired. "Please?" she pleaded innocently.

"Did you come out with me to play for this camera or for me?"

"You believe I won't smash this camera right now? Wreck all the photos!"

I decided to let out all the anger built up today in one go.

Still, maybe I shouldn’t throw it—ending up breaking up over it wouldn’t feel safe enough.

"It’s fine, I’ll just take photos with my phone myself," my girlfriend said coldly from the side.

"I’m leaving, you don’t understand me at all, you’re not worth my love." Just like Jacky Cheung, I felt heartbroken.

"Shi Huang, don’t go, wait for me!"

"Go find someone else who’s willing to take photos for you? Some internet beauty? What’s the use if your heart isn’t beautiful." My mind was made up.

"I really know I was wrong, Shi Huang, I need you.........."

Hearing her say she needed me, my heart softened. After all, she had apologized. I might as well forgive her.

"You really need me? Then let’s go home happily." I said.

"Yes, I really need you......"

"Power bank."

And so, how to take an internet beauty girlfriend on a one-day trip to Taichung was a huge success.

Link to previous episode:https://goo.gl/3ZgDPq
Bonus Chapter:https://goo.gl/qZDs9l

Shop Information:

DO FUN Tuba

Address: No. 196, Gongzheng Road, West District, Taichung City
Phone: (04)2301-1357
Business Hours: 10:58–20:58 (Weekdays) │ 9:58–20:58 (Holidays) │
Note: The black tea is really good. I kept begging the staff if I could buy the tea bags, but never managed to. Hope they see this and let me beg again.

Bulga Premium Ice Cream

Address: No. 117, Gongzheng Road, West District, Taichung City
Phone: (04)2302-7738
Business Hours: 12:00–21:30 (Weekdays) │ 10:00–21:30 (Holidays) │
Note: The origin of "Bulga" is that each grid is like a gemstone; also, the owner loves Bulgari’s business model. The ice cream toppings are all in-season and natural, with no artificial coloring added.

Miss Sen’s Tea Shop

Address: No. 11, Lane 2, Alley 368, Minsheng Road, West District, Taichung City
Phone: 0972-143-371
Business hours: 11:00~19:00
Note: Graduation season is approaching, and the tea shop has launched a graduation gift box specially designed for those who can’t graduate.The wings included are meant to make it impossible for them to fly away even if they had wings.

Sui Ge Clearance Sale

Address: 4F, No. 957, Section 2, Wuxing West Road, West District, Taichung City
Business hours: 10:00~20:00
Note: Only until May 14th, Converse is 60% off storewide. Also, clearance sales rarely focus on hiking and trekking, but Sui Ge specializes in hiking shoes. The staff are friendly and treat customers like family—you can even chat with them when you have time.

pumpkin house

Address: No. 108, Wuxing 4th Road, Taichung City
Phone: (04)2372-8456
Business hours: 11:00~15:30, 17:00~22:00

Citizen Square

Business hours: It's a tourist attraction
Address: Gōngyì Road, West District, Taichung City

Audit New Village

Business hours: It's a tourist attraction
Address: Lane 368, Minsheng Road, West District, Taichung City

Caowu Dao (Grass & Enlightenment Path)

Business hours: It's a tourist attraction
Address: Xiangshang North Road, West District, Taichung City

Qinmei Park

Business hours: It's a tourist attraction
Address: No. 68, Gōngyì Road, West District, Taichung City

Follow the Love History to Unify the World
TribeBlock Fan Page