From the time my daughter was five months old, I started traveling with her. Back then, it was quite amusing — I drove myself while she sat in a rear child safety seat. Every two hours, I’d stop at a rest area to change her diaper and nurse her in the car. Over the course of more than 4,000 kilometers, I sang to her and talked to her. Even though she couldn’t understand, she seemed to sense how hard I was working and never cried or fussed. I often think my daughter is very easy to travel with. Ever since she was little, she’s been on the go with me — she’d sleep as soon as she got in the car, smile when she woke up, and could even babble back and forth with me at five months old.
Of course, at that time, she definitely couldn’t talk yet — just “ah ah ah,” and I would respond, and she’d keep going. On that trip, there were times when I took her by myself, times when her dad joined midway, and also long stretches when my grandparents were with us. I remember many moments when I carried a basket with her in it as I visited all kinds of historic sites, telling her about them, and she’d laugh and babble along.
Starting when she was three years old, we began taking her abroad, with both budget trips and relatively more comfortable travels. My life principle has always been: we may not buy luxury goods or expensive clothes, but we must explore the world on foot with our family.
Over the years, I’ve accumulated a lot of experience traveling with kids. We’ve gone through forests, climbed volcanoes, and seen some of the most beautiful sunsets and sunrises in the world. Today, I’m sharing some pre-travel advice for moms — not about packing food or clothes, but mental preparation, which is far more important than material preparation.
One: Let your child help choose the route
Many well-educated parents around me don’t realize how important it is to respect their children. They decide where to go and only tell their child right before departure, as if the child only has to follow orders. Actually, getting kids involved in choosing destinations early helps cultivate a sense of responsibility and includes them in important family decisions. Usually, at the end of one holiday, I’ll discuss with my child where to go for the next one. I typically recommend two places, and she gets to choose. I explain the pros and cons clearly, let her think it over, and then we finalize the decision — but once it’s made, it can’t be changed, because it was her choice too.
Once, during a short break, she picked a nearby hot spring by herself. Later, hearing that classmates were going to the grasslands, she wanted to switch. I told her: No way. Because we’d already made a choice, made bookings, and you can’t just change your mind on a whim. That way, next time she chooses, she’ll put more thought into it.
Two: Prepare books for the journey
This is super important, yet often overlooked.
If left entirely to their own devices, many kids would rather bring an iPad and rarely remember to pack books — yet travel is actually a great time to foster reading habits. In my opinion, if a child is already addicted to iPads, you should set the rule of no iPads before the trip. Especially after age six, this is a crucial period for developing reading habits. If a child still hasn’t picked up reading by ages eight or nine, it becomes much harder to cultivate later. During travel, there’s a lot of waiting time — waiting for flights, trains, queues to get in — having a book makes the child calm. I often see Chinese families at airports, parents and kids all staring at their iPads, for hours, with barely any conversation, everyone hunched over playing anxiously.
Last month, on a family trip to Hawaii, I was really struck by something. One morning, strolling on the beach, there was a row of people on lounge chairs, of all ages, each with a book in hand, completely quiet and peaceful. There was a little girl who looked about six or seven, with seven or eight books beside her. My daughter walked over and asked if she could read with her. The family was very friendly, and although my daughter doesn’t usually read much in English, that day she really got into it. It made me think again: environment really does matter. I suggest bringing light and enjoyable books for your child during the trip — don’t worry about the weight, it’s worth it. And of course, if mom and dad also set an example by reading, that’s even better.
Three: Talk to your child about the local characteristics
And look up information together
Before departure, preview the local customs and culture with your child, turning them into little stories to spark their interest. Wanting to go somewhere themselves is more important than us dragging them there. Not long ago, we went to Hawaii again — our second trip. First, I had my daughter recall the sights from last time, whether there was anywhere she wanted to revisit. Then we looked up information to see what we missed last time and shouldn’t miss this time. This time we were going to a new island — Maui. Together, we looked up info and found out about the Road to Hana, a road in the northern part of the island that netizens rate as one of the most beautiful roads in the world. It’s said that within a two-hour drive, there are over 500 turns and dozens of bridges — sounds really tempting. So on our first day in Maui, we went to the Road to Hana. Because we’d done our research beforehand, my daughter was super excited the whole way, constantly telling her grandparents what we might see up ahead. Feeling like a little tour guide gave her a huge sense of accomplishment.
Four: Teach your child to make a daily travel plan
I usually travel independently. Once the route is confirmed, I start making a travel plan — how much money to bring, what medications to carry, which sights are must-sees, which foods to prepare in advance, and so on — to get the child mentally invested in our trip. Along the way, I keep discussing the next day’s plans with my child. For example, the next day we could choose to take a helicopter ride or go boating. I’d go through the pros and cons, involving her in the decision-making and planning process. When you’re prepared, you feel more confident. Later, it became a habit for her to ask, “Mom and Dad, what’s the plan for tomorrow?” She’d even offer suggestions. These skills are useful not just for travel, but for life. She learned the importance of planning early, and it became a habit applied to every detail of life. For instance, she always packs her schoolbag and lays out her clothes the night before, and she discusses weekend activity plans with me by Wednesday.
Five: Agree on a daily allowance amount
During the trip, I give my daughter some pocket money for her to manage herself. Typically, it’s 20 RMB per day domestically, or 20 in local currency abroad. This was the amount agreed upon before she turned eight, and we planned to increase it once she turned ten. At first, she’d run out and spend everything the moment we stepped out. But after more trips, she gradually learned that there might be better things later, and she started to practice self-control. If she didn’t spend all her money one day, I’d give her two extra yuan the next day, to introduce her to basic financial concepts. On this recent trip, I noticed she’d improved a lot — she spent very little throughout, until the last day when we went for a buffet. On the way, she asked me, “Mom, can I treat everyone to lunch today? Is my money enough?” I was so happy — she’d learned to control spending, and decided to use it to treat the whole family. We had a wonderful meal, everyone thanked her for the treat, and she kept smiling shyly, enjoying the pride of “paying the bill.”
Six: Make a gift list
Before leaving, I talk with my child about who we should buy gifts for. Kids are adorable — they often come up with long lists, and I help her refine them. So in many shops, you’ll see my daughter buying this for a classmate, that for a friend. Though the items are inexpensive, she puts a lot of heart into it. After the trip, I have her deliver the gifts herself, and explain why she bought each one and the story behind it. That way, she revisits the journey again.
Nowadays, life is better, and travel has become a part of our lives. Travel doesn’t have to be to fancy, high-end places. We often go to remote mountainous areas too. It might not cost much, but brings a lot of joyand happiness. And if you can prepare these six things in advance, it will definitely be twice the result with half the effort.